Take a word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing a letter or sillible, and supplying a new definition.

18. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

17 . Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly

16. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

15. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding dense people that stops ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

14. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

13. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

12. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

11. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.

9. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease.

8. Karmageddon (n): It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

7. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of starting the day without a cup of coffee.

6. Glibido (n): The part of a person's character that causes him to be all talk and no action.

5. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of dumb ideas to seem smarter when they come very quickly.

4. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

3. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

2. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.

And the pick of the litterature:

1. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both ignorant and an asshole.

Close This Window